NEW!

Things Not to say to a cop

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are you Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

7. You're not gonna check the trunk are you?

8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. that's how far ahead of me they are.

12. When the Officer says "Son, Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?"
You probably shouldn't respond with, "Officer, your eyes look glazed, have you been eating donuts?

You know the mailman plays CS when he carries around an AUG and yells "Enemy Spotted!" when he see's a ravid dog coming for his ass

You know the Mayor plays CS when he has the urge to turn the community municipal hall into a Terrorist base

You know your friend plays too much CS when he tries to come up from behind you whenever he see's you and tries knifing you in the back of the head

You know your office co-worker plays too much CS when he gets into a proned position with a pretend AWM aiming at your boss's office door

You know his friend plays too much CS also when he plays along and pretends to toss a flash grenade down the hall

You know I play too much CS when I keep going on like this

You also know I play too much CS when I r0x0r j00 b0x0rz

1. Complete withdrawl from the community into an enclosed space with mouse and a monitor.

2. Uncontrollable cursing and screaming. Loved ones think you do this out of insanity. "You can't believe you didn't kill that son of a bitch!"

3. While at a party, and someone is talking about something you don't care to listen to, you tend to find yourself thinking about where in the room would be the best place to snipe this fucker.

4. While walking down the street you have "Complete Situational Awareness". Knowing full well those Terrorists are tricky bastards!!

5. When engaging in hostile words with your neighbor for "Those war sounds that come from your house at all hours of the day AND night". You think to yourself: "If I had my Colt, this conversation would be over!!"

6. when your girlfriend's mother walks into the room you hear the words: "Enemy Spotted" in your head.

7. Whenever you see a Cop, you have the uncontrollable urge to start jumping from side to side.

8. The word camping refers more and more to your playing style, rather than what you do with a tent.

9. You have a fascination with converting where you work, or your school into a CS level.

10. While in an argument with your Girlfriend about "How much time you spend playing that game". You respond ver angrily: "Well when you get taken hostage by terrorists, don't expect me to come rescue you!"

11. In your worst nightmares you always get handed a glock while your opponents get colts.

12. You start writing "You know you play too much CS when..." articles.

13. You can identify a weapon just by hearing it...in real life...

14. When you her footsteps behind you, you stop and listen.

15. When you her footsteps behind you, you duck for cover.

16. When you her footsteps behind you, you start jumping.

17. You respond by using "Rodger that", "Affirmative", and "Negative".

18. You have the cops called to your house because of "reapeated gunfire comming from within".

19. When someone angers you, you have an urge to kill him, shout "Hostage Down", and throw 1000 bucks on the floor.

20. You start giving yourself nicknames like: "The Ingram Master" ot "Colt Masta"

21. Others start giving you nicknames like: "Camper", "Sniper", "Lamer", "Charger", "Newbie", "HPB", "LPB".

22. You can make headshots with the AWP while jump-strafing.

23. You actually kill people with the TMP.

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Soooo... which ones apply to you?